A Stoops Family Christmas

Nothing like the holidays to bring even the most divergent of families together. Take for example the annual Stoops gathering in Youngstown, Ohio.

There's Grandmama Stoops, sharing yuletide cheer with the wives and children gathered around her cracklin' fireplace. Eager hands empty platefuls of steamy gingerbread cookies, fresh from the oven, and hoist nutmeg-dusted cups of eggnog for yet another teary-eyed toast. Across the house the husbands sit in front of the big-screen TV, just like they always do, talking football.


It's just like any traditional family holiday. If family traditions include breaking down game film.

See, the Stoops family is to coaching what the Wallendas are to wire. Bob (above) is just finishing his 10th season as head coach of the Oklahoma Sooners. Bob's brother Mike (left), who was once Bob's defensive coordinator in Norman OK, now calls Tucson his home. He took over as coach of the Arizona Wildcats in 2004, leaving one brother and joining another by bringing Mark (below) on board as his defensive coordinator.


And what of Ron Stoops Jr. (below left)? Well, he fell closest to the Stoops tree. Literally. Ron coaches football a mile or two away at Youngstown's Cardinal Mooney preparatory school, as the late Ron Sr. had done for 28 years until his sudden passing in 1988 at the age of 54.

No fiction could better capture the events that occurred on that fateful October night. Cardinal Mooney was facing their arch-rivals from Boardman. The teams fought it out in a steady rain, dead even and destined for overtime. And who was up in the booth coaching Boardman's defense? Why Ron Jr., of course. Ron Sr. left the sidelines late in the game with severe chest pains, and with his son by his side, he took his last breath in an ambulance moments after Mooney's triple-overtime victory.

Ron Stoops' death rattled the Ohio rust-belt community to its very core. It was only natural that RJ jump sidelines, and that is where he's been ever since. Until his son--yup, Ronnie Stoops III--starts drawing up X's and O's and thinks he knows a thing or two more than his old man, that's where he'll stay too.


While these personalities are enough to make Christmas night anything but silent, this year in particular could well turn them into nail-salon regulars.

Mmmm-kay...'ssslike this: Bob's Oklahoma Sooners are gearing up for their New Year's Eve clambake with Stanford down in El Paso's Sun Bowl. And Mike's Arizona Wildcats--Mark's Wildcats too, for that matter--have a date with the Nebraska Cornhuskers in San Diego Wednesday night at the Holiday Bowl.

While Bob might not know the Cardinal like Mike does--or Mark, for that matter--Bob knows Mark and Mark knows Stanford since Mike's Wildcats--and Mark's too, for that matter--play them every year. Likewise, Mike and Mark may not understand the inner workings of your basic Cornhusker--but their brother Bob has a clear understanding of Nebraska, which is understandable since the Sooners tangle with them on a regular basis. Understand?


If ever there were a reason to work on Christmas Day, this family has found one. In lieu of making time and a half, they'll have to settle for shaving a point and a half off the Vegas books as they help each other improve his odds of emerging victorious. Talk about your insider information.

And despite the high school football season being over for more than a month, even Ron Jr. can't help but provide more engaging insight than the oft-forgotten and little-mentioned brother Zeppo (right), who toured with the Stoops Brothers for a season or two but ultimately chose to go his own way. Who knew the talkies were gonna catch on?

Finally! College Football's Biggest Rivalry Means Something Again

This Saturday marks the 110th renewal of college football's greatest rivalry, Army versus Navy. And this time, there's something at stake besides military bragging rights.

Should Army snap the Midshipmen's six-game series win streak and avenge last year's embarrassing 34-0 defeat (the first shutout in 30 years of Army-Navy football), there's an open invitation waiting for them at the Eagle Bank Bowl December 29th in Washington DC to face Temple. A Navy win and UCLA will take their place, leaving the Cadets on the outside.

How significant is that? Imagine a scenario where all three military institions go bowling this season. I don't believe that's happened since the days of Doc Blanchard.

Navy is 8-4, and has already received an invitation to play Missouri in the Texas Bowl New Year's Eve. And as irony would have it, neither of these teams despite their 2009 success, was the pick to play in the Armed Services Bowl. That honor went to the Air Force Academy. And I use the term honor loosely here, since the Falcons will be traveling to Fort Worth, Texas, on New Year's Eve to face a heavily favored 10-3 Houston squad.

Oh, and if things weren't special enough, there's history between the two coaches. Army's coach, Rich Ellerson, was recruited to join June Jones' staff at Hawaii in the early 1990s by current Navy head coach Ken Niumatalolo, who was an assistant.

At last, there's a bonafide reason to watch the Army-Navy game this year. Beyond the pageantry and the arrival of George W. Bush, that is.

Ndam That!

If I were vice chairman and head of the invitations committee at New York's Downtown Athletic Club, I would prepare invites to this year's Heisman Trophy ceremony for one quarterback, two tailbacks and one defensive predator.

Predator? Ndam that!

Ndam would be Ndamukong. As in Ndamukong Suh (pronounced En-DOM-ah-ken SOO). As in, the defensive lineman from the University of Nebraska that is so dominating--or En-DOM-a-ken-ating if you will--that he has single-handedly transformed the Cornhusker defense from bottom feeder (they weren't in the top 100 statistically last season) to top-20 nationally recognized menace. The 6'4", 308-pound defensive end deserves a place (or two, or maybe even three) at this year's presentation alongside Texas Longhorn quarterback Colt McCoy, Stanford University tailback Toby Gerhart and senior Alabama tailback Mark Ingram.

A late bloomer in this year's Heisman race, Suh was surely a sight to see on the biggest stage. The part-African (Cameroon), part-Jamaican phenom tossed McCoy around his backfield like a catnip mouse as Nebraska, two-touchdown underdogs heading into last Saturday's Big 12 Championship game, took mighty Texas to the very last second and then some.

Forget the set-up job at the end of the game. Never mind the heavy hands and wringing hands of the vested interests whose act of collective panic not only turned back time, it turned major college football into Saturday Night RAW! What they did to "ensure" a Texas-SEC BCS Championship will have to be the subject of a future rant... er, post.

I'd rather focus on the one player who by himself all but gave the BCS shaken-playoff-formula syndrome.

Ndamukong's interesting name belies a complexity of Heisman support points. (Evidently NCAA rules prohibit amateur athletes from buying a vowel.) Suh has scored twice in his career, two touchdowns off of five interceptions... mundane stats for a DB but extraordinarily impressive considering that he's a defensive tackle. As a down lineman he ranks among the nation's best defensive backs in passes defended. All told, after thirteen games, Suh leads the Huskers with 82 tackles (23 for loss), 12 sacks, 1 interception, 10 passes broken up, 24 quarterback hurries, 1 forced fumble and 3 blocked kicks.

Ndamukong is as unpronounceable as he is improbable. His statistics are like so many numbers of a connect-the-dots picture who on their own cannot possibly illustrate the degree of his impact. Stitched into the fabric is also the fact that each week Suh faces what no other Heisman Trophy candidate must face: the double- and triple-teaming of opposing offensive linemen and linebackers, not to mention the razor-sharp focus of thirteen offensive coordinators. Even with the lack of "sexiness" a lineman brings to the table, the endless multiple-teaming may ultimately serve as proof positive why that bronze running-back-with-stiff-arm award seems forever destined for skill-position players.

Next to Suh, Michigan cornerback Charles Woodson's 1997 Heisman stats ring clear as a bell. However, if you watched the Big 12 Championship game, you undetstand the Ndamukong Effect--though you may well be unable to explain it to anyone who didn't watch it.

Put it this way. Each year the race usually hinges on a candidate's performance vaulting him into the lead and leaving his competitors in the dust. This is the first year that I can remember where one Heisman candidate literally destroyed another's campaign through his play. McCoy was an erratic 20-of-36 for 184 yards with zero touchdowns and three interceptions. Suh sacked McCoy 4 1/2 times and although he didn't actually pick off any of his passes, he gets three assists just by being on the field. The Suh Ledger from Saturday's game: 12 tackles, 7 tackles for loss, 4 1/2 sacks, 202 total yards allowed.

Okay, once more with feeling. 202 total yards allowed. 202 yards from a Texas Longhorn offense led by (until Saturday) the Heisman front-runner and two-time Big 12 Offensive Player of the Year. In his previous 12 games McCoy had completed 3100 of 432 passes for 3,328 yards and 27 touchdowns. That's more than 277 yards a game through the air alone. Add to that another 368 rushing yards (30.6 per game), and you'll see that McCoy alone accounts for nearly 310 yards of Longhonoffense per game.

With Suh leading the Nebraska defense, McCoy and his Longhorns gained just 202 yards of total offense all night.

At season's end, Suh leads the Huskers with 82 tackles, 23 tackles for loss, 12 sacks, 1 interception, 10 passes broken up, 24 quarterback hurries, 1 forced fumble, and 3 blocked kicks. To me, it's hard to justify a claim that McCoy is the best player in the nation when he wasn't close to being the best player on the field yesterday. Now many experts say that Suh is clearly the most outstanding college athlete in the nation. Hey, doesn't the plaque attached to the Heisman Trophy say the same thing?

As for who's going to win the hardware then... I say Mark Ingram. Oops, sorry. I meant to say FLINT'S OWN Mark Ingram.

Why Ingram? First, his THREE rushing touchdowns and 189 all-purpose yards against the top-ranked Florida Gators, the biggest performance of the season's biggest game. Second, his 1,542 yards rushing and 15 touchdowns, which led Alabama to a 13-0 season, the nation's #1 ranking and a berth in the BCS Championship Game. Lastly, most importantly and most astonishingly, the fact that no Crimson Tide player has ever won the Heisman Trophy before.

Think about that for a minute. The crimson and cream has brought college football such superstar names as Joe Namath, Ken Stabler, Don Hutson, Johnny Musso, Major Harris, David Palmer and Shawn Alexander, among others (and those "others" by the way include Lee Roy Jordan, Ozzie Newsome and Derrick Thomas, not to mention Steve Sloan, who quarterbacked the Tide to back-to-back national championships in the 1960s). Yet not one bust resides within the halls of the Downtown Athletic Club. No Alabama player has even finished runner-up (the closest was David Palmer's third-place finish in 1993, 'Bama's last national championship season).

Look for that trivia to be forever rectified Saturday night.

The perks of forced retirement

How does a 6-6 football team get into a New Year's Day bowl? Disguise themselves as band members? Drop the name Salahi at the players' entrance?

Nope. All they need to do is have a coaching legend retire.

Florida State's Bobby Bowden (center, back row) announced Thanksgiving weekend that he will step down following the Seminoles' upcoming bowl game. To be technically accurate, the University "retired" Bowden, relieving him of his duties the way a family takes the electric knife and relieves grandpa of turkey detail. Just days earlier, the 80-year-old walking definition of Florida State football mentioned that he'd like the swan song of a final season to walk along the sidelines at Doak Campbell Stadium. Next thing you knew, the legendary coach was at his press conference, calling it quits with all the free will of an American hostage in Iran.

One more season? Hmm. Let's see...

o You've coached the Seminoles for 34 seasons, amassing a record of 315-97-4 while in Talahassee. That's a winning percentage of 75.9%. In other words, since you took over in 1976 your 'Noles have won three-quarters of their games.

o Your 388 career wins are second all-time in college football history to Joe Paterno's 393.

o You led the Noles to two NCAA national championships, in 1993 and 1999.

o You're already in the College Football Hall Of Fame.

o Since joining the Atlantic Coast Conference in 1991 you've won 12 of a possible 19 conference championships, including nine straight from 1992-2000.

Ummmm sorry, coach. Unrealistic request. But cheer up, dad gummit! You're still one of The Anointed Few... so a handsome retirement gift is right around the corner.

Remember how we took care of Tom Osborne? Forget the gold watch--he was given a share of the 1997 national championship. And while a few na'er-do-wells didn't appreciate such generosity (namely the Michigan Wolverines, who became the first unanimous #1 team ever to win their bowl game and drop in the rankings), most thought it was a fair and fitting present (in particular the two coaches who had to drop 12-0 Michigan to third behind your one-loss Seminoles to make it all happen).


You're in the same beloved fraternity as Osborne, Bobby. How else do you explain that Coupe De Ville of a 1993 national championship you received? Remember that? Florida State and Notre Dame each had a single loss, and you guys lost to them head-to-head that November. Yet you miraculously leapfrogged the Irish and unbeaten West Virginia for the chance to play for the national title.

So stop sniveling, geez. And no you're not being treated like a Big Ten coach, you're in good hands.

Being that you finished the 2009 season at 6-6, We just can't pull the strings and get you into a BCS bowl. The guys would really bust our balls on that one. Not that we wouldn't swap Florida State for Boise State in a heartbeat--trust me, you'd be unbeaten too if you played in that conference. It's just, you push it and pretty soon people start getting those crazy playoff ideas in their heads. Then you might as well kiss the whole old boys club goodbye!

Sewwwww... how bout this. New Year's Day. Sunny Florida. And a date in the Gator Bowl. Heck, Jacksonville is practically a home game for you boys. We've even found an opponent as winnable as any you could find: West Virginia. Remember? The team you once coached (see pic), decades before you leapfrogged them for the national title?

Oh, and just to show there are no hard feelings, we'll hand-pick your very own officiating crew, just the way you like it. What else could an 80-year-old retiree ask for? I know. Depends.

Michigan Football 2009: There's No Defense

Three years and five days ago, on the eve of the most significant game of the greatest rivalry in college football, legendary Michigan coach Bo Schembechler passed away. At the time the maize and blue were 11-0 and ranked #2 in the nation, one game away from playing top-ranked Ohio State for a berth in the BCS championship.

In the three seasons and two games since his death, the Wolverines are 16-23.

Michigan's defense had given up 133 points in those 11 wins, an average of 12.1 points per game. In 39 games after Schembechler died it has hemorrhaged over 1,000--1,026 to be exact--or 26.3 points a game, 27.0 if you only count D-1 competition (and you should).

Maybe it's just the darndest of coincidences. Maybe it's a harbinger of the program's death spiral. Or maybe it helps explain why the winningest school in college football history just finished its second straight losing season, after going 42 years without one.

A Quick Reminder to the Lake Orion Dragons

Before the Lake Orion High School varsity football team boards the bus and heads to Clarkston for their second meeting with their bitter rivals in as many weeks, hopefully these reminders will provide some perspective for Coach Bell and his team.

Perspective cannot be found in last week's cyber-bullying at the hands of the 9-0 Wolves. What Clarkston did in their 42-13 soaking of the fire-snuffed Dragons on their soggy faux turf was extract demons. Demons of frustrated seasons past.

Last season at Lake Orion, the Wolves' were treated as such, held to a mere seven points until a late touchdown closed the margin of defeat. Instead of wrapping up a league title, their dreams were shattered, and their season ended a week later in round 1 of the playoffs.

And in 2006, two weeks after upending the Dragons on their home field for the for the OSA league title, they hosted their rivals again. This time for the district championshiop. The Dragons coasted to a healthy lead before Clarkston mounted an all-out assault in the fourth quarter, melting the lead away and putting the game in the hands of their prolific offense. Victory and a spot in the district title gam was in their grasp, until. Until fourth and one at midfield with two minutes left, they were denied, stoned for no gain and Lake Orion moved on.

In fact, Lake Orion has moved on to the district finals each of the last three seasons, losing to Macomb Dakota in '06 and '07, then stunning Stevenson in the single greatest high school game I've ever witnessed last season on their way to Ford Field.

But those demons are dead. Tonight we see if they still have gas in the reserve tank. Because there's one thing about Chris Bell's teams. They don't take losing lightly. Especially within their own league, where they hadn't lost in two seasons before last week.



If they want to repeat 2006 and pay back Coach Kurt Richardson's Wolves on his own field, Lake Orion needs to do two things.

First, shut down their talented quarterback, Tyler Scarlett. The senior had his way with the Dragon defense the entire game last week, doing everything but picking the score. The senior signal-caller is the engine that makes that team move. He doesn't have the rifle arm of the Dragon's Sean Charrrette, but he can see the field as well as any QB in the Detroit area. He reacts to the defense, all night long. He needs pressure. Constant pressure. He needs two people on defense with the sole purpose of following #10 on every play. Even if he dishes the ball off or tosses a quick timing pattern pass, that kind of defensive mentality will still pay off in making opportunities. Fumbles, penalties, broken up passes. Maybe even a pick six, being that he loves throwing in the flat. Quarterbacks aren't as productive when they're constantly rushed, it's a fact. The Dragons need to make that happen or it's over.

And second, CONTROL THE BALL. It doesn't have to be pretty. All it has to do is move chains and run time off the clock. The longer Scarlett stands on the sidelines, the more pressure he'll be under to score every time he touches the ball. Pressure on Clarkston would be good.

If they are to move on in the playoffs beyond tonight, both of those objectives must be accomplished. I have a funny feeling the Clarkston Wolves aren't all that impressed with Lake Orion based on last week's debacle. And I have a sneaking suspicion they'll be in for a big surprise. Defending district and regional champions do not disappear easily. Especially when they're under-estimated. Go Dragons!

Doin' The Hater Chop

How much do I loathe everyone's number-one college football team? How much do I throw up in my mouth every time I hear some hackneyed reporter belch out one of their pre-scripted "you can't help but cheer for these guys" cliches about America's supposed darlings, the Florida Gators?

Let's put it this way. After today I will channel any and all available resources, human or otherwise, to make sure Florida doesn't reach the BCS championship game, much less win it. I'll drink the blood, sacrifice the appropriate fowl, what have you. Whatever it takes.

The Anointed Ones were tied with Arkansas 13-13 midway through the fourth quarter on Saturday when Razorback quarterback Ryan Mallet (remember that name, Michigan fans?) tossed a perfect pass to Greg Childs. The sophomore wideout caught it in stride, cut across field and scored on an electrifying 77-yard touchdown pitch-catch-and-run. Childs was hit as he crossed goal line, jarring the ball loose and knocking him to the ground. However he managed to jump back up, crawl across the end zone to fall on the ball. So even if he didn't score on the reception, he scored recovering his own fumble.

Yet the veteran CBS announcing team of Verne Lundquist and Gary Danielson must have spent the previous commercial break scoring hallucinogens on a Gainsville street corner.

They gasped when the officials called for a review of play, each telling the nation how important a call this may turn out to be. Oh really? Is it really important to determine whether Childs gets credited with a TD catch or a fumble recovery for a TD? Frankly I don't know why the play was even reviewed, since it would have led to the same result in either scenario.

But tell that to Verne and Gary. The pair were either conjoined in some form of dual brain lock or busy doing a quiet Gator chop gesture in the press booth. Still immersed in self-created contraversy, Verne--a man with nearly a half century of sports broadcasting experience under his belt - suggested that the play may be ruled an incompletion. An incompletion! Childs caught the ball at the midfield, crossed the width of The Swamp to the other sideline, fought off a tackler at the 15, picked up a key block at the 10 and lost the ball upon reaching the goal line. That was one hell of a bobble, eh Verne?

Not to be outdone, Gary--who starred at Purdue before moving into the booth for ABC back in the 1980s--threw out this "possibility": should the refs determine that Childs fumbled before crossing the goal line, they may just rule the ball dead at the point of the fumble.

HUH?????? How can that possibly be? When is a play ever dead at the point a ball is fumbled? The closest I can come to the mid-fumble-whistle theory is a situation where a player either loses the ball and it travels backwards and out of bounds (whereupon the point he fumbles is also his forward progress)... or intentionally fumbles it forward, typically in an act of last-minute desperation. Neither applied to what Danielson runaway train of thought. The only situation here was one of two wishfully thinking announcers grabbing at straws. No matter how much you wish it to be, sometimes it just can't be.

As it turned out, the officiating crew led by Marc Curles ultimately confirmed the ruling on the field, giving Arkansas the touchdown. Had they reversed it, it would have given Arkansas a touchdown. Oooh such suspense.

The officials weren't finished. On the Gators' ensuing drive they flagged the Razorbacks for two phantom 15-yard penalties. The first was for pass interference on a defensive back who did nothing but play his position. The second, an undefined personal foul on defensive tackle Malcolm Sheppard. All he did was put a hit on charging Florida lineman Marcus Gilbert.

How bad was THAT call? Even Danielson couldn't help but rip the refs for it. It wasn't after the whistle had blown. It wasn't at the head or knees. It was a chest-on-chest block against an on-rushing Gilbert. Gilbert was the one who was knocked to the ground, however. And in Gainsville, apparently, Gators aren't supposed to hit the ground. So Arkansas was given a personal foul for a really good hit.



The two gifts gave Florida 26 yards of its drive to the tying touchdown. Then in the final minutes NCAA-dream-date quarterback Tim Tebow (the dude with scripture on his cheeks) drove the Gators downfield again, as everyone expected him to do, for the winning field goal. The misty-eyed mediots have already started calling it Tebow's "Heisman Moment"--even though the kid hasn't thrown for 800 yards all season. Happy Sweetest Day, Timmy! Ur the gr8st, Urban! Love... the SEC, the BCS, the NCAA... heck, everybody!

I'll just say it: both calls were bullshit. In fact they weren't merely bullshit. They weren't simply two blown calls. These refs didn't miss anything. That would be excusable. They saw things happen that didn't happen. Which can't help but leave you with a how-come-I-had-a-straight-flush-and-still-got-beat feeling. It's as if there was a higher power involved. Maybe the BCS gods were summoned. Gee, ya think?

So everyone wants the Gators to win it all again huh. Well fine, then I'll be the one who doesn't. I think Florida is a bully. A football program that couldn't wait to pound their mighty chests the minute they dropped Miami and Florida State off their schedule. (Imagine Michigan ending their rivalries with Ohio State and Notre Dame because these opponents are deemed too "competitive".) A school so badass they haven't played a single regular-season football game outside of SEC territory in over a quarter century. A poseur of a team with a cry-baby a coach and an altar-boy do-no-wrong quarterback. Yes I'm admittedly biased, nonetheless I think they leap-frogged over #2 Michigan in 2006 by whining incessantly until enough voters dropped the Wolverines--whose season had already ended--to third in the BCS rankings. (The Wolverines have never lost to the Gators, beating them twice in Florida bowl games... and I'll never miss a chance to bring up this fact when it's relevant.)

They're a team that gets phantom calls on the field and cheerleader-worthy support in the booth because there's just too much at stake in December and January. Florida is the SEC flavor of the month so they have to be there till the end. And no upstart, upset-minded Arkansas team can change That Which Must Be.

Then fine, I say. Give Tebow the Heisman right now. Give Florida a free pass to the BCS title game, right now. But don't force this on us under the guise of legitimacy. Don't force us to listen to network apologists make up rules. Don't force us to watch as referees make up penalties. Have a little respect for the intelligent, objective football viewers out there--the ones who aren't wearing alligator heads.

There must be a few of us out there, right?

FOLLOW-UP: Since my blog post the SEC has officially suspended Marc Curles and his entire officiating crew. The league said there was no video evidence to support the personal foul on Arkansas defensive lineman Malcolm Sheppard in the fourth quarter as the Gators were rallying to overcome a 20-13 deficit. Florida scored on the drive and eventually beat the Razorbacks, 23-20.

As it turns out, last weekend's Arkansas-Florida debacle is the crew's second controversial call of the year.
The same group worked the LSU-Georgia game earlier this month, in which the conference ruled an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty late in the contest should not have been called. This is the first time in SEC history that the league's front office has publicly suspended a football crew.

"A series of calls that have occurred during the last several weeks have not been to the standard that we expect from our officiating crews," SEC commissioner Mike Slive said Wednesday. "I believe our officiating program is the best in the country. However, there are times when these actions must be taken."

The SEC says Curles' crew will be removed from its next scheduled assignment on October 31 and will not be assigned to officiate as a crew until November 14. The league said the crew's bowl assignments could also be impacted. Link to the complete story: http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=4583642

Manager Of The Yerrrrrrrr Outta Here!

If ever a man could be asked to leave his own wedding reception, it would be Jim Leyland.

Seriously, what is it with this guy? He stirs this hybrid emotion in the Detroit Tiger faithful that toes the line between astonishment and despondence like some masochistic field sobriety test. He's the five stages of death all rolled into one. One big long nicotine stick of addiction, obsession and reckless abandonment, lit ablaze at one end and sucked on at the other.

Leyland took a team picked to finish sixth in the five-team American League Central Division and worked them like a rosin bag. By the end of Spring, this squad sprung to life as if touched by Geppetto himself. Pitchers acquired for utility infielders became All-Star worthy. Arms that lost 17 games the previous year were on a tear to win 20. Powerless infielders were adjusting their stances and putting up anabolic numbers.

This man took a pitching staff and--with a heavy hand yet a helping hand nonetheless--crafted it into one of the best IN THE MAJORS. Counting pitches, measuring tendencies, playing game #161 like game #16... all the things that make those who turned the turnstiles at Tiger Stadium gargle with their own bile, he done did.

The Tigers jumped into first place before we were halfway through May, and have stayed there, alone or tied, ever since. That's a span of over four and a half months. Why they can't fill Comerica Park without mentioning the word "bobblehead" is as much a mystery as the skipper himself. The Lions can't show you four and a half months of first place without pulling out VHS tapes of Billy Sims. Yet week after water-tortured week they sell out despite their failure.

So WHAT keeps our opinions vacillating between AL Manager of the Year and "Fire His Ass"? Is it that scent he wears, a mix of musk and dog chaser? What so intrigues and repels the push-me-pull-you in us? Furthermore, what makes me delve so deeply into this psyche for the ages right now? (It's more Unhealthy Obsession than Detroit Sports, that's for sure!)

I'll tell you what keeps me rubbernecked. The feeling I get that the guy's got another great big inexplicable surprise waiting for us.

The feeling I have that tomorrow he'll be turning the Metrodome into a hospital zone. I don't know what he's got up his sleeve besides a crinkled pack of reds. But by the seventh inning whatever it is may just have 50,000 once-screaming fans quietly reading Twin Trivia in their game programs. And none of this Miguel Cabrera nonsense will enter into it. (And I'm one of the only writers in this town who won't talk about it.) In fact, the distraction may help the rest of the team focus and play better. They may actually prefer not being in Detroit right now.

Call it a feeling. Call it vicarious detox tremors. Call it that numb sensation immediately after you strike your index finger with your hammer. But oh it feels good.

Maybe just call it Leyland's modus operandi: that which is earned is best earned when all else is lost. Remember the Marlins? [And no I don't mean some feel-good movie about football-playing fish.] Remember that ramshackle team he led to a most improbable World Series victory over the heavily favored Cleveland Indians? This is the guy who made a PERENNIAL PLAYOFF REGULAR out of the Pittsburgh Pirates, for crissakes.

Just look back three years. Remember what stood between the 2006 Tigers and a Banner-Raising Ceremony? I'll remind you: a weekend series with the lowly Kansas City Royals at home. A Tiger (Woods) tap-in. So what'd they do? They surrendered 29 runs in those three games, that's what! The Twins passed them (who'd've thought?) and claimed the title Detroit had been missing since the Reagan years of 1987.

And with the Twins' Central Division title came a comparably so-totally-easy ALDS with the Oakland A's, for which they would have home-field advantage. Detroit on the other hand had to regroup somehow and travel to the Bronx to face a Yankee lineup that all but literally awoke the Yankee lineup of '27. Despite taking the Tigers to their first playoffs in 19 years--in his first season as manager mind you--Leyland was suddenly in the hot seat.

So how'd that seat work out? The A's routed the Twins in straight sets. The Tigers brought a youngin named Zumaya to Yankee Stadium who threw a seventh inning of 102- and 103-mph heat that blew up the Yankee bats, and they finished the pinstripes off in four games. Then they swept Oakland and entered their first World Series in more than two decades. As it turned out they didn't need home field, playing equal amounts of both during the run. And Jim Leyland became a folk hero.

Well my stories are like arrows, they may be long but there is a point at the end of it. And the point here is that Leyland seems to thrive when nobody expects it. There's no more "let's win early so we can rest our pitchers" mentality. They're 1-0 so far in games they're playing with their last life. And right now everyone in the entire city of... wait, cities of Minneapolis are writing the manager and his team off. JL himself said about the one-game playoff, "Nobody will think we've got a chance. So let's just see what happens."

I'm getting visions already, coach. Visions of a victory, and not a close one either. Hey, I predicted the Tigers would beat the Yankees in four games no less back in '06. And how many others were by my side then? [Hint, it was a very, very small number.] I can't shake the image of Rick Porcello taking a few shots but otherwise stifling the Twinkies through seven. Or the image of Tiger lumber cracking the ball into those monstrous gaps in the outfield, leading the kitties to a resounding win--despite Cabrera, despite the "collapse", despite everything.

Or the image of their stoic manager when it's over and the division's been won, looking just like... well, just like he does on any other day. Dude's a freak job, remember?

How much don't they want it?

So a day has passed, and with it two of the most important games of the season for the Detroit Tigers and Minnesota Twins. Two games packed with five games worth of excitement. And now that the infield dust has settled, guess what? We're exactly where we were the day before, with Detroit hanging onto a two-game lead in the AL Central.

If you just read the box scores, it would look like nothing more than a simple split of a day/night double-header. What you don't see in all those numbers is the non-stop drama of two teams winning despite their best efforts to give the games away.



Take nothing away from the poise and perserverence of pitcher Justin Verlander [see my pic], who has thrown more pitches than any other major league pitcher and added 129 more tonight in his 18th win of 2009. Was it really just a year ago when he had 17 games in the loss column? Or the six-plus innings of one-run ball thrown by rookie starter Rick Porcello. Or even the clutch hitting of center-fielder and lead-off spark plug Curtis Granderson, whose four Tuesday hits included eighth- and tenth-inning right-field bombs--the latter by day and the former by night.

The heroes wore both white and gray to be sure, as each team played with the fire of opportunity burning brightly in the crisp September air. But for the most part, what 65,000 fans saw on the field was anything but heroic. No home team slamming the door, no visiting team making a statement to their hosts. Instead they witnessed an array of brain-dizzying performances that made the crisp air feel more like that of late February Grapefruit-League Florida:

1. Normally flawless second baseman Placido Polanco--who owns the longest errorless streak for a major league second baseman and currently leads the AL in fielding percentage at .998--flat-out booted a routine grounder in the first game, putting a Twins runner in scoring position.

2. Twins manager Ron Gardenhire called for a suicide squeeze with one out and the score tied in the ninth inning of the early game (the batter, Nick Punto, needed only to put the ball in play for the winning run to score). Instead Punto popped his bunt attempt to pitcher Brandon Lyon, who tossed to Brandon Inge doubling up the runner on third.

3. Not to be outdone, Lyon threw consecutive wild pitches in the tenth inning that allowed Denard Span to move from first to third. (He had thrown just one all season.) Span ultimately scored on an Orlando Cabrera hit to break the 1-1 tie and key the Twins' 3-2 win.

4. In the second game Tiger skipper Jim Leyland brought in the speedy Wilkin Ramirez to pinch-run for Marcus Thames. A drifting Ramirez was picked off of first base without even intending to steal second on the play.

5. Granderson misjudged an outfield pop-up that would have been the final out of the nightcap. The ball sailed over his head for an RBI double, putting the tying run on second base.

6. And Fernando Rodney did what he does best, saving the second game after letting the tying run reach second and in so doing, inducing another 30,000 cases of acquired arrhythmia.

While both games were riveting, down-to-the-wire contests, they won't be remembered for their high caliber of play. Two circus geeks may make for an evenly matched forensic competition, but that doesn't mean they'll be debating neo-Marxism.

Nonetheless, the Tigers now sit at 84-73 with three games to go, the magic number for clinching their first-ever Central Division title (and first division tile of any kind since 1987) down to four. Their worst case scenario at this point would be losing three of four to the Twins and entering the final weekend series in a first-place tie. (Detroit hosts the Chicago White Sox, while Minnesota hosts Kansas City.) And their best-case scenario? Winning the final two games against Minnesota of cours, since the second of those wins would clinch the division Thursday afternoon.

The more likely scenario is that the teams split their final two games, and the four-game series. Minnesota has the pitching advantage (Twins veteran Carl Povano faces rookie Eddie Bonine on Wednesday, while Scott Baker goes for win #15 against the Tigers' Nate Robertson Thursday afternoon). But Leyland has the edge in the bullpen with more fresh arms, having used a total of three relievers in the first two games after Verlander and Porcello threw 14 1/3 of the 19 innings.

Minnesota will score early, Detroit will score late. If the Tigers can force the Twins starters to throw 20-pitch innings, or if Leyland can effectively maneuver his well-rested relievers, their chances for a sweep increase dramatically. If the Twins can jump to a sizable lead and ride their starters through seven strong innings, they can put their fate in the hands of stopper Joe Nathan to shut the door as he has all season.

A split would leave the Tigers two up on the Twins, putting their magic number at two. So with three games to go, a single Detroit win (or Minnesota loss) would lock up no worse than a tie and one-game playoff on Monday in the Twin Cities. Two Detroit wins, however--or two Minnesota losses, or one Detroit win and one Minnesota loss--and corks will be popping all over as the Motor City braces for another World Series run. Got riot gear?

How big a deal would it be to beat Michigan again?

Put it this way. The last time the Michigan State beat the Wolverines in consecutive football seasons, MAN HAD YET TO WALK ON THE MOON.

4 games in 49 hours. It's baseball's lightning round.

After being rained out last night, the Detroit Tigers and Minnesota Twins will now take the field today for a day/night doubleheader (fancy way of saying "no, you can't see both games with one ticket"). They play again tomorrow night and wrap up the series with a Thursday matinee.

So two days or roughly 52 hours from now, this race could be over. Or it could be just beginning.

One doesn't have to turn many pages in the way-back book to find the last instance of the Twins coming from nowhere to win the American League Central Division. Three years ago, the Tigers held the top spot, as they had for virtually the entire season. All they had to do was beat the Kansas City Royals at home in the season's final series. Win once and force a one-game playoff. Win twice and the championship banner goes to the printer.

Of course we all remember what happened. Detroit was swept in four ugly one-sided games, and Minnesota cashed in, winning the division and a much-easier AL Divisional Series match-up with the Oakland A's. In losing the gift given them, the wild-card Tigers had to travel to the Bronx and take on the Yankees, possessor of the league's best record and a lineup many were comparing to 1961.

Fans look back fondly at 2006 and conveniently forget that the kitties' playoff run began with an utter collapse. A choke-job the likes of which this baseball-mad town hadn't seen since the Toronto Blue Jays lost a 3 1/2-game lead to the Tigers in the final seven games of the 1987 season.

Coincidentally, seven games remain in 2009. And although Detroit's hairline lead is but two games, the tailspin--should Minnesota overtake them to win the division--will have officially begun three weeks ago. On September 6, the Tigers had a SEVEN-GAME lead on the Twins. And by the end of the day, they could be tied.

Here are the scenarios the Tigers face as they enter these four games--their most crucial series in years--with a magic number of six:

1. WIN THREE OF FOUR. Paaaaaar-ty. Division champs. On-field celebration Wednesday night or Thursday afternoon. A lap around the field. Champagne poured on the heads of policemen. Let the fun begin.

2. SPLIT THE FOUR GAMES. The Tigers remain two up and the magic number drops to two, as the teams enter the final weekend of the season. Detroit hosts the perennial thorn in their side, the Chicago White Sox. And Minnesota welcomes Kansas City to what could be their last three games at the Hefty Bag. UNLESS... they end the season tied with Detroit and force a one-game playoff, which would be held Monday afternoon in the Metrodome. Gulllllllp.

3. WIN ONE OF FOUR GAMES. This would result in a tie at the top of the division, with three games to go and the magic number at four. In this situation the Twins would seem to have the edge. Zack Grienke would surely pitch against them. Assuming he picks up where he left off on Sunday when he stymied Minnesota's bats on the way to a 4-1 Royals win, the Twins have a very good chance at winning the other two games. Which leaves Detroit facing the White Sox needing to sweep for the title, or win two to force a most inhospitable playoff game.

4. MINNESOTA SWEEP. The Tigers would enter the final weekend trailing the Twinkies by two full games. They would need to sweep Chicago and hope for the Twins to lose at least two games, or Detroit's next game will be in Lakeland next February.

THAT is how important this series is. And for the Tigers, the first game is most important of all. Win it and the Twins take the field tonight three games back, facing a magic number of four and a gunslinger named Verlander on the mound. Lose it and the Twins, who know they have favorable pitching matchups on Wednesday and Thursday, come back tonight down a single game and trying for a tie in a game many say they can afford to lose.

Don't you just love a pennant race in this town?

The Boys Of August

Another successful pre-season has ended, and while they failed to match their spotless 4-0 record of 2008, the Detroit Lions nonetheless delighted their fans, winning all but one game of this season's August slate.

The glow on the faces of Lions backers everywhere wouldn't be diminished by Sunday's 45-27 pounding at the hands of the New Orleans Saints. Most who follow the Honolulu blue and silver understand not to get too caught up in their team's performance during the sixteen meaningless games that remain. Leave those to the teams who feel the need to prove themselves on a snowy day in some frozen stadium. The focus for these Lions, as it has always been, remains the four-game stretch in the sweltering heat of August. Crunch time as it were.

Saints quarterback Drew Brees threw six touchdown passes during a 26-for-34, 358-yard afternoon. But as strong as Brees performance may have been, it couldn't erase New Orleans' 10-7 loss the previous week to the Miami Dolphins, a loss that crushed their chances at a perfect pre-season and dropped them into a tie with Detroit for "pre-champs" in the league.

Lions running back Kevin Smith put it best when he said he'd rather win the pre-season games than the first regular-season game. Smith almost got his wish, were it not for Detroit's most unfortunate loss in Cleveland in pre-week 2. No matter. This Sunday the Lions return home to face Brett Favre and the Minnesota Vikings, as they continue their three-month tune-up for August 2010.

These Lions won't change their stripes either

There’s the National Football League. And then there’s the Detroit Lions.

Few understand what drives an organization toward such consistent and unwavering failure. The Lion's historic 0-16 record last year was anything but a fluke. In fact, they’ve been working toward that mark for as long as I’ve been around.

It’s a commitment that extends beyond “that piece-of-BLEEP quarterback”. Although it's hard to top Dan Orlowsky scrambling out of his own end zone--literally--then staring in disbelief at the whistling referee, as if about to contest his indisputable misjudgement.

It goes deeper than “that BLEEP-ing BLEEP-hole coach”. Despite the fact that no Lion head coach in my lifetime has ever been hired as head coach of another NFL team. Or that the one future Hall of Famer in their midst had to bolt to Miami for a head coaching opportunity (and the chance to coach a Super Bowl team, which Don Shula did five times, winning two Super Bowls). Ironically Shula's 1972 Dolphin team is the last to finish with a perfect winning record.)

We can’t even stop at “that stupid BLEEPER-BLEEPER Millen”. Though it bears mention (and once-over with bright fluorescent highlighter) that the man brought on to “fix” a 9-7 team started his regime with 12 straight losses and ended as guiding force behind the 16-beatdown season that set the NFL all-time record for futility.

It begins and ends with Chairman-Of-Board William Clay Ford, otherwise known as "that BLEEP of a BLEEP owner" or more succinctly, "the head BLEEP." A man incapable of succeeding as an executive in his grandfather's automotive corporation, yet deemed competent enough to take ownership of Detroit's professional football franchise in 1960.

When Ford inherited the role of team president in 1959 the Lions were the team of the decade, with NFL titles in 1952, 1953 and 1957 and five championship game apperances. But one man was about to change all that.

WTF, WCF?

In a year’s time he peddled star quarterback Bobby Layne—the pre-Joe Montana Joe Montana—for a guy by the name of Milt Plum. A year after taking sole ownership of the club in 1964, he terminated the services of coach George Wilson--the man who led the Lions to their last league title. The NFL's most successful team of the 1950s would go the entire decade of the 1960s without a single playoff appearance. Not till the AFC-NFC structure was formed and wildcard teams were added to the playoff format in 1970 did the Lions even reach a postseason game. And even then they found a way to embarrass themselves, losing at Dallas 5-0 in the NFL's first playoff game without a touchdown.

But the most visible imprint of the Ford regime, appropriately enough, would be cosmetic. Stripes were added to the helmets, shirt sleeves and pants of the uniforms during the first year of his ownership. A symbolic move to be sure, but one that follows the team's misfortunes to this very day.

So when the owner's son, Bill Ford Jr., "unveiled" their new exciting uniforms for the upcoming season--at a suburban sporting goods store, conveniently enough--was anyone surprised to see those stripes still prominently in place? The scarlet letters of mediocrity no one dared remove, lest they face the fate of the kings royal guillotine themselves. As long as the Lovable Loser is calling the shots, the team will carry his monogram.

It's not exactly like people need a program to spot the ineptitude of this franchise. Ford has hired 14 coaches since replacing Wilson with Harry Gilmer in 1965, a turnover rate of roughly 3 1/2 years. Only two of those 14 left with a winning record--linebacker-turned-Hall-Of-Famer-turned-head-coach Joe Schmidt, the most successful Lions coach I have known (which, being that he resigned 37 years ago, speaks volumes) and Gary Moeller, who walked the sidelines a mere seven games. Even the winningest coach in team history, Wayne Fontes, left with a sub-par 67-71 record. The franchise has had seven head coaches since 2000. By comparason, the Pittsburgh Steelers have had three head coaches since 1969.

Mr. Ford is also proud caretaker of first NFL team to make the playoffs despite having a losing record. He un-retired Schmidt's #56 jersey--and gave it to Pat Swilling. I saw his Lions score a touchdown late in a game to draw within four points of an opponent, then elect to go for two. I watched them win a coin toss in overtime and take the wind instead of the ball.

Even with this half-century-long chinese dragon of mediocity, his infamous 2008 Detroit Lions dropped the bar low enough to hit magma. They surrendered more points than any in NFL history. In fact you can't even point to any game and say that the outcome could have gone either way. If ever an 0-16 record is an accurate reflection of how a team played, it's this one.

It takes quite an individual to do what Ford has done to the Lions. They've had two Super Bowl coaches. One died of a heart attack in his yard after one season. The other quit in the middle of the season--with a winning record. They've had three "franchise" players, all Heisman Trophy running backs from Oklahoma. The first two (Steve Owens and Billy Sims) blew out their knees four years after being drafted. The third, quite possibly the greatest back in NFL history, lost his desire to play after nine seasons.

And now their lone tradition--the Thanksgiving Day game--has been so one-sided of late that they're in danger of losing that too. Only leadership as profoundly clueless has that of WCF can drive a team this far into the ground. Yet eight times a season 70,000 blue-faced idiots plop their carb-filled butt cheeks into $100 seats and boo for three hours. Some have done this since the team played at Tiger Stadium. That'll show the owner!

And all the while, they've worn those stripes like silver banners. In the Olympics, it's the symbol of not winning gold. In this town, it's the symbol of not winning period.

And the award goes to.. Lebron's coach

How on earth did Cavs head coach Mike Brown NBA Coach of the Year honors?

Honestly? Pull all-everything league icon Lebron James out of his lineup and he’s got himself a .500 team. Maybe. Cleveland's defense has stepped it up a notch, same with the offense, but neither due to anything radically different from the coaching staff. It's better explained by the evolving, ever-broadening talents of #23. Lebron is bringing a more aggressive nature to his game, and his teammates are dialing up their intensity to keep pace. Plus, LJ is quicker on transition and recovery, encouraging everyone around him to take more chances on the perimiter. As a result, turnovers and transition baskets are up, while the added pressure has helped cool opponents' shooting.

And give an assist to star treatment, which has finally shone down upon the Lake Erie shoreline. It's hard to believe these are the same two teams who played in the 2007 Eastern Conference finals. This year's Cavs-Pistons series more closely resembles '91 Bulls-Pistons--the year the "automatic" whistles started going Michael's way. Friday's game 3 saw one of the worst no-calls on a blatant goaltend that I have seen. It saw Danny Crawford give Rasheed Wallace a T for calling him "an idiot" while sitting on the bench. Lebron carried the ball but the ref defended the deep-throating his whistle with a "it's not walking; he was bobbling it" gesture. And Crawford counted Zydrunas Ilgauskas' last-second shot although the ball was clearly in his hands when the backboard lit up (it was later overturned). The Pistons had 14 team fouls at intermission, and would go to the line just 12 times to Cleveland's 30. Lebron--who finished with 0 fouls--is a smart man, and will take whatever he's given. So he's taken advantage of the star treatment like no one since that other guy in the red #23 jersey. And well he should.

Which brings us to coach Brown. His most important attribute this season is the fact that he's liked by Lebron. And I'm being sincere here. There is absolutely no disharmony on his team. Sure they're all on LB's back, going for the ride. But they all pretty much started at the same time and have all grown together, figuratively and literally. So if the NBA ever has a mock election, he wins "Most Popular Coach in his Class" hands down. But COY? Sorry, Mr. Congeniality. Even with two monstrous Ilgauskas steps in the paint I can't go that far.

Off the top of my head I can think of four coaches--FOUR!--who are equally if not more deserving this season:

• Nate McMillan (Portland was the league’s youngest team and also happened to turn in the biggest one-season turnaround, going from "Playoffs-DNP" to "home-court advantage in round 1".)…

• Jerry Sloan (This guy’s never had less to work with at Utah. Yet this year's 48-win result looks like those of the Stockton-Malone days)…

• Rick Adelman (He got the Houston Rockets to elevate their play for an entire season, even though he rarely had his team intact and injury-free. 53-29? Are you kidding? This is perhaps the greatest coaching feat of all)…

• And Phil Jackson (yes, Phil Jackson. After the 2004 Finals meltdown and Shaq’s departure, everyone thought the Lakers were done. And as strong as last season’s Western Conference champions were, this year’s team plays even better. This may be Jackson’s best coaching performance yet.).

All but one of the above names have proven themselves in years past. This is where Brown's lack of big-game success would seem to be the biggest cause for hesitation. In this rarefied air he's still wearing the proverbial breathe-rite strip.

What if the Cavs get to the Finals and repeat their embarrasing four-and-out 2007 NBA Finals performance against the Western Conference champion? What if they don’t even reach the Finals? They still have to go through Boston. And whether or not the Celtics have Garnett in the lineup, they’re still the defending champs.

The Bulls fired Doug Collins after successive trips to the conference finals. The Pistons let go of Rick Carlisle AND Flip Saunders despite each having just reached the NBA’s final four. Jeff Van Gundy ring a bell? He was dismissed and all he did was bring the Heat within two minutes of the Finals.

To date the biggest games of the Mike Brown era are games 5 & 6 of the 2007 conference finals against Detroit. In the former, LJ scored 29 of the team’s final 30 points; in the latter a steadily depreciating and easily defeatable Pistons squad melted down inside Quicken Loans Arena. If there were a test to prove one’s untestedness, the Cavs wouldn’t have even been there to take it. I hope that’s clear.

Bottom line is, the coach could lose his job at the end of the season. So how can he possibly be named NBA Coach of the Year? If Brown doesn’t keep the Cavs from underperforming in the playoffs for the third year in a row, the club must do whatever is necessary to reach the next level.

If they don’t, you can bet King James will.

20-20 foresight

According the the "experts" - the people who have nothing better to do but sit around projecting the fate of NCAA bubble teams, in itself enough to disqualify their credibility yet I digress - Michigan's victory at Minnesota this afternoon has enabled the school to earn its first tournament berth since 1998. That's eleven long, agonizing seasons.


In anticipation of the win I was ready to write about the team, about their newfound leader Manny Harris, about coach Jim Beilein taking twelve kids to unthinkable heights. But I was struck by a comment I heard during the broadcast that was too good to ignore.

One of the announcers stated that Northwestern, who beat #20 Purdue on the road last Wednesday ruining Senior Night for the Boilermakers, was clearly "the best ninth-place team in the nation." I had a good laugh at that comment, then I started thinking about what the man said.

Michigan's win put the Wolverines at 19-12 overall, 9-9 in the conference, with the Big Ten postseason tournament yet to come. Thanks to big wins over UCLA and Duke (see my pic) they're considered in, without having to win 20 games. If the Northwestern Wildcats win tomorrow at Wisconsin, they will sit at 18-11 overall and 9-9 in the conference. A strong tournament run, not entirely out of the question, could easily vault the team in the cute purple unis to their first-ever March Madness experience. That's right, they've never made it to the round of 64 in school history.

Such is the crazy world of Big Ten basketball, 2009 edition. In fact, with three games remaining to be played the league could find itself with a five-way tie for fifth place - and fifth place earns a first-round bye next week in Indianapolis's crazy 11-team party.

But the potential for craziness doesn't stop there for me. Okay my potential for craziness has never fully been tapped, yet I digress. There's a not-so-implausible way that nine Big Ten teams could finish the season with 20 wins. Imagine nine conference schools making the NCAA tournament. That's unprecedented for the Big Ten, for college basketball and for the whole of college sport. And this so could happen.

Assume the five-way fifth-place scenario I mentioned earlier becomes a reality. In other words, let's say Northwestern goes to Columbus and drops the Buckeyes, and Wisconsin gets caught paying more attention to brackets than Hoosiers and falls to Indiana. (In the third regular-seson game, let's say Michigan State, who has already wrapped up an outright league title, loses to Purdue, who needs the win more. Each already has 20+ wins so the result is insignificant to my point.) The five-way knot sets into action several tie-breaking formulae, resulting in the following seed breakdown for next week's tournament: 1. Michigan State (14-4 in the Big Ten and 24-5 overall); 2. Purdue (12-6, 23-8); 3. Illinois (11-7, 23-8); 4. Penn State (10-8, 21-10); 5. Wisconsin (9-9, 18-12); 6. Northwestern (9-9, 18-11); 7. Michigan (9-9, 19-12); 8. Minnesota (9-9, 21-9); 9. Ohio State 9-9, 19-10); 10. Iowa (5-13, 15-16) and 11. Indiana (2-16, 7-23).

As I said earlier, the top five seeds get first-round byes. So on day one, 6 plays 11, 7 plays 10 and 8 plays 9. If Northwestern beats Indiana, Michigan drops Iowa and the Buckeyes beat Minnesota (all three resulting from the better team winning in my opinion), that creates the following quarterfinal matchups: Michigan State vs. Ohio State; Purdue vs. Michigan; Illinois vs. Northwestern and Penn State vs. Wisconsin. MSU takes care of business, Purdue outlasts Michigan, Wisconsin stops Penn State and Northwestern pulls off a mild upset over their in-state Illini rivals. That puts the Spartans in a semifinal matchup with Wisconsin, while Purdue faces Northwestern.

If the Badgers do to State what they've done 9 of the last 13 meetings and defeat them, they would become the ninth Big Ten team to hit the 20-win mark.

The bar for the major schools has been .500 or better league record and 20 wins overall. You hit those two marks and your ticket's stamped. So if it's impossible for the selection committee to fathom giving one conference over an eighth of its 65 invites, what will they do?

Will they say "no dice" to a 20-13 Michigan team with the nation's 11th toughest schedule; who took on all comers all season long, beating two top-five teams out of conference - one of which (Duke, see my pic) they actually played twice - and lost by single digits on the road at then-#1 UConn?

Will they give the heave-ho to a 20-11 Ohio State team two years removed from the national final, a team who crushed the Miami Hurricanes and Notre Dame Fighting Irish in consecutive games - both on the road?

Do they deny a 20-12 Northwestern squad who won more games against RPI-top-50 teams than any of these Big Ten teams, who reached the conference semis (in my scenario), their miraculous ride to the school's first-ever NCAA berth?

Would they dare cut the legs out from the 21-11 Penn State Nitany Lions, who despite their early conference tourney exit has had an at-large berth seemingly locked up for weeks?

Might they say "no mas" to 21-10 Minnesota - winners of their first twelve games, including a neutral-site victory over then-#9 Louisville - and Tubby Smith, the only Big Ten coach not named Izzo with a national title on his resume?

Or do they give the boot to the Badgers? Remember the Wisconsin Badgers? The team with the nation's sixth toughest schedule? Last we heard, they were 20-12 and waiting to play for my hypothetical Big Ten tournament championship. If they were to defeat the winner of my Purdue-Northwestern semifinal, it wouldn't matter what teams they played last December. They're in with the win.

The NCAA Tournament Selection Committee has four Big Ten teams with their bags already packed, and five more holding their cell phones and waiting. Each of those five teams has a virtually identical story: fifth-place finish in the league, .500 or better conference record, 20 or more wins overall.

How bout we settle it with a game of H-O-R-S-E?

It's just a feeling, okay?

The quote of the World Baseball Classic (so far), from one of today's heroes.

Adam Dunn, who hit the 2-run HR that ended up being the difference in Team USA's thrilling 6-5 win over Canada, was asked what it feels like to play in the World Baseball Classic as opposed to spring training. He answered, "It's a playoff atmosphere... even though i've never been in the playoffs."

Dragons at an exhibition

Coach Bell--soon Mr. Bell, associate principal, as my son enters ninth grade this fall--it was a pleasure meeting and chatting with you at the Welcome Night last week. And congratulations on the successful program you've built with the Lake Orion Dragons.

Since football guys like you tend to have little if any appreciation of the arts, the "finer things" as they say, I've amassed a gallery of scenic photography that may be more to your liking. Feel free to break out some Bordeaux and a brie wheel.

Here's a picturesque scene overlooking the Lake Orion High School field turf, just after the Dragons scored the only points of their first-round game against Utica Eisenhower with less than two minutes to play. Good use of minimialism.



This dramatic setting paints the portrait of utter despair. Sterling Heights Stevenson is pulling away. Time is running out. A coach, a team, the dreams of a city... all hopes are in the hands of a fifteen-year-old kid. Our poor little protagonist has no chance at all. Ummmmmmmmmm, right.



The following two frontier landscapes evoke past, present and future.

The first, captured above the bitter-cold tundra of Troy Athens, captures the formerly immovable object, Dearborn Fordson, being moved backwards for sixty minutes by the unstoppable force.



The second, while similar in appearance, is even more breathtaking in its contrast. Both real and surreal, it fills one with optimism, giving us a feeling of what we can all accomplish when we have the dream and the desire.

So who's got the Utes to do what's right?

NCAA division I college football has no national champion.

Oh it used to, back when all the writers and coaches were free to vote for the team they felt was the best. And it will someday soon, when the power brokers come to their senses and scrap the seven-figure ceremonies in favor of an actual playoff system.

But right now, there is no true champion. Merely a collection of pre-selected post-season games called the Bowl Championship Series--college football's answer to the arranged marriage--whose "champion" is only called the "national champion" because this collective body of greed mongers secured the rights to associate the term with their endeavor. In case the irony escapes you, let me put it this way. A sport as balls-out brutal and violent as major college football not only determines its national champ by way of popularity contest, but is unusually proud to do so. Miss Freaking America runs a more legitimate competition, for God's sake.

Look at this year's BCS farce. Assuming Texas does to the Ohio State University what Florida and LSU have done in previous years, it's entirely possible that the nation's top two teams won't even be playing in the BCS championshhip game. And the one team who has done all that was asked of them? As it turns out, they never had a chance to make it into the BCS championship game to begin with.

The Utah Utes are the only major college team with a perfect record. They rolled over--and I mean ROLLED over--the Alabama Crimson Tide in the Sugar Bowl. 'Bama, to refresh everyone's memory, was the nation's #1 team for the majority of the season, losing their shot at the BCS championship in their final game when the Gators rallied to beat them for the SEC title.

So on January 8, you had Florida--who hung on to defeat the school Utah just blew out of the building last week--playing Oklahoma, on whom Texas hung 45 points in their double-digit win.



The fact that this is pure injustice doesn't seem to be the point. What needs an enthusiastic response is this: when will anyone care? How many more years of "the system works, it just needs fixing" can the college football fans take? How many schools need to get impregnated behind the middle school before someone stands up and demands a true champion?

Just look at the mess at the end of each season this millenium, and you can see that in almost every instance, the best team in the nation may not have even played for the BCS Championship:

2001--Oregon finished with the #2 ranking and wasn't invited to the party.

2002--Nebraska, ever the darlings of doey-eyed pollsters, won the BCS swimsuit competition and was chosen to play Miami in the Rose Bowl--ooooh what an attractive matchup THAT would be huh?--despite losing at the end of the regular season to Colorado 62-28 and not even making it to their conference championship game.

2003--USC finished the regular season unanimous #1 yet they weren't even invited to PLAY in the BCS championship game. For some reason the computers picked Oklahoma over them, even though the Sooners were blown clean out of their conference championship game by Kansas State, 35-9. They even snowed the Heisman voters into giving quarterback Jason White the trophy, a player so powerful, so dominant, he wasn't even drafted by the NFL. He played part of one season on the practice squad of the Tennessee Titans, and currently owns an OU memorabilia store and an Athlete's Foot.

2004--this was the year of the Auburn Tiger. Their magical unbeaten season is the main reason why their defensive coordinator was just hired to replace Tommy Tubberville. So why didn't they play for the national cham... sorry, BCS championship? The almighty computers felt they weren't as strong as--surprise!--Oklahoma, who managed to get pansed, swirlied AND taped to their lockers by the Trojans by a 55-19 count. Critics cite this as the point when pageant officials determined that henceforth, no SEC team with an argument will ever be denied a chance to play for the BCS title.

2006--Ohio State and Michigan finished #1 and #2. They played each other in an epic battle of national powers (much less bitter rivals) which the Buckeyes won by three points. Michigan so impressed the pollsters that they remained the unanimous #2 team in the nation afterward. Yet the public outcry--and by "public" I mean the crying of one Urban Meyer specifically--forced voters to manipulate subsequent polls in such a way as to allow Florida to leapfrog the idle Wolverines into the second BCS spot.

Then there was last year. When Ohio State finished its regular season they were ranked seventh. They not only ended up in the BCS championship game, but they landed there as the nation's #1 team. What's worse is the fact that they played a two-loss LSU team--a team who happened to leapfrog a one-loss Kansas team because--surprise!--they didn't play in their conference championship game.

The only season that seemed to be in the clear was 2005, when unbeatens Texas and USC faced each other in Pasadena. Despite the fact that ANY system short of "prettiest helmets" would have placed them at 1 and 2, the BCS braintrust (as oxymorinic a term as "convenience fee") fell over patting themselves on the back and saying, "The system works!"

This year, it appeared to me that the best two teams were Texas, whose only loss came by a point inside a Texas Tech stadium that frequently approached the threshold of pain, and Utah, the nation's only perfect team and one who proved their worthiness by thumping the Crimson Tide and ending the season ranked #2. Why couldn't we have seen one if not both of them? What made freaking Oklahoma a better candidate, for the love of annual humiliations?

I'm absolutely mystified at the almost mystical powers held by Ohio State and Oklahoma. They get embarrassed, flat-out throttled every year, yet they continually jump more deserving teams for a chance at the farcical national title. Even this year, the also-rans of the supposedly weak Big Ten--who are 0-9 all-time in bowl games against the SEC don'tcha know--earned a BCS berth with a 10-2 record, while 11-1 Texas Tech, from what was supposedly the nation's toughest conference, gets shut out.

And all the while the BCS keeps carrying around this illusion that they're legitimate. Amazing. Almost makes you pine for the days when coaches would use their retirement as a plea for number one votes, huh?

But I have faith. I'm a big believer in change, as you could tell by my Barack Obama blog (the link is on the right side of theis page). In fact, here's what our new president-elect said about the farcical gridiron ceremony known as the BCS, during a 2008 interview with 60 minutes:

"I think any sensible person would say that if you’ve got a bunch of teams who play throughout the season, and many of them have one loss or two losses, there’s no clear decisive winner; that we should be creating a playoff system. Eight teams. That would be three rounds, to determine a national champion. It would add three extra weeks to the season. You could trim back on the regular season. I don’t know any serious fan of college football who has disagreed with me on this. So, I’m gonna throw my weight around a little bit. I think it’s the right thing to do."

If Mr. Obama wants to throw his weight around in this arena, he's more than earned the berth.

The pictures are in (finally!)

In this day and age, we're able to use technology to recover photos of our great grandparents. We can restore faded color from Polaroid pictures from the '50s and '60s. So long as they aren't photos on the obsolete memory stick of my son's five-year-old digital camera, who knows what we're capable of.

Well this personal mystery-of-capone's-vault caper is officially over. I found a capable person at a photo studio in town who had a compatible driver and a DV-to-USB fire wire that connected to my kid's camera output.

In short, I now have access to my photos from the greatest football game I've ever seeen.

If you were reading this blog last fall, you'll recall my post on the Michigan high school regional final between Lake Orion and Sterling Heights Stevenson. (If you weren't you can access it through the archive on the left.) I had left my camera at home but I didn't want to miss what I felt was Lake Orion's best-ever chance to reach the state semis (they had lost in this round the last two seasons). So I happened upon my son's old outdated three-point-two-megapixel digital camera in the back of my Xterra. Even he has moved on to a more advanced camera!

Anyways I had enough batteries for the job, but the card only held 30 or so pics. That plus the camera's limited ability to capture images at night virtually guaranteed my effort wouldn't be Pulitzer-worthy. But who knew what I would end up capturing.

So here they are. The first photo is of "The Kick": Jeff Heath's miraculous last-second 49-yard field goal that won it.



The next few here are basically just post-game mayhem, as we ran onto the field and joined in the impromptu celebration.











That's Heath proudly holding the Michigan Region 1 Championship trophy. The look on his face is priceless.



I was lucky enough to be a part of Coach Bell's post-game speech, and even luckier to have captured it.



And the last two pics here? In all the excitement I momentarily forgot that I'm just a peon with no authority to be there or do anything I was doing. But I commandeered the team to pose with the trophy in front of the scoreboard for me, which still showed the improbable final score.



The second shot doesn't happen to have the scoreboard in it, but it's the best of all the team shots I took, with the most kids frame.



So embrace the wonder of technology with me, and enjoy!